9/13 Ride Report - The Fixie Legion

They came out in droves, the young guns with their 12 lbs single speed bikes. White, black, and even a pink bike, the Fixie Legion were going to use their bike’s weight advantage to challenge the Geared Riders, and to tackle the famous 12% grade Yorba Linda hill. The Legion was led by an all-powerful Fixie Master, Scott M. He was going to lead the young guns to their challenge. Thus start the now famous 2009 Fixie Ride...

The Geared Ones knew they were in for a challenge, but had trust in their legs and their Colnagos. As the ride approach the ominous Yorba Linda hills via the River trail way, the speeds averages 25-26 mph. Slowly, but surely, the Fixie Legion fell one by one to the way side. Not even their youth can save them from the relentless attacks of the Gear Masters. Approaching the base of the climb first were gear masters Nick, Richard, and Tuan. They had wiped out all of the fixies except for Adam, a young fixie rider with quads the size of tree trunks. He was the only one that survived the assault.

Quickly Tuan attacked the climb, with Richard and Nick followed, and all took turn at the front. This was too much for Adam, as his quads and 12 lbs bike could not save him. Adam quickly fell back unable to follow. I pass Adam, and was the 4th to ascend the Yorba Linda beast, with Dashaan right behind me.

Up on top, we saw far in the distance a single fixie remains, weaving back and forth across the wide road as the steep grade took its toll on the rider. On closer inspection, the pink color stood out. Huffing and puffing on her bike, Nhung slowly crawled her way up the hill. We were transfixed and could not believe that this beast of a hill could be tackled by a single speed. Minutes later Nhung arrived all out of breath, and she let out a primal scream of her conquest. The Fixie Legion was saved face by this single fixie rider.

Wait a minute... we are not done. Out of the clouds came bursting Andy, Lance’s one-two man. Andy must be training for next year’s Team Shack already, knew he would have the Alps and Pyrenees to tackle later, and put all his effort into this training climb.

We rolled down the hills and met with the group. From there, fixie and geared riders rode as one back to the parking lot. The Fixie Master, Scott, knew his fixie team was beaten today and made up for it by working hard at the front. The Animal still lurks beneath that fixie exterior.

At the parking lot, slowly the fixies disappears into the light. They swore that they will be back to take their revenge. The Geared Riders will be here, and will be ready for the challenge.